Advise for parents with toddlers: Tie it tight

I've been meaning to write this down for all you parents of toddler height children. I believe everyone's experienced this, but no one had made the effort to write it down, or maybe it is too ridiculous or has become a taboo subject.

These young kids like to run up to their parents (sometimes it's me, sometimes it's not) and nuzzle their faces in your groin area. It's at this point when you look around and if you spot some other adult looking, you can quickly look away and avoid all eye contact - or you can just tell them in a confident voice "he likes the smell".

The other thing these children do is tug at your shorts/skirt/swimming trunks or what have you. So make sure you tie the string (if you garment doesn't have a string, then you are in serious trouble and I implore you to go get new clothes) tight and pray that it doesn't give way. I have this horror scene playing in my mind where I'm carrying Amber in one hand, and a shopping bag in the other and Shannon comes running to me screaming (which is not unusual) and tugs at my shorts to get me to stop walking. In my imaginary movie, the string is not properly tied and the underwear is built into it (you know the type I'm talking about). And of course, we're in the middle of a crowded shopping mall.

So please, heed my advice and tie it tight!