Look into their eyes

As I sit here in Burger King typing this - and doing work at the same time - there is a father having breakfast with his son sitting right in front of me happily eating their big breakfasts. Looks like a happy scene - which I think it is. But there is one thing that strikes me, and it took me a while to notice it.

While they are having their conversation, which I can't really hear because of the loud music, the boy is making a large amount of eye contact with his father, well at least he is trying to. Each time he speaks to his dad, he makes steady eye contact as if looking for approval, signs of acknowledgement and so on. The father, on the other hand, responds while looking elsewhere, around, outside. I can't be sure, but I think he looks uncomfortable looking into his son's eyes as he talks.

I don't think this is unusual. Even though fathers and sons share a different type of "manly" bond, many fathers are uncomfortable having hear-to-heart talks with their young boys. Boys, on the other hand, before they turn to men are always looking to their dad's for direction and an insight into life and standard behavioural practises.

I think I might be a victim to this as well - but what is important is to be aware of this and look for opportunities to change where possible. While Nigel is still young, I'll continue to try my best to maintain a close and loving relationship with him so that we don't grow apart. Even though boys (and girls too) need to grow independent of their parents, having the ability to have open talks while looking at each other in the eye remains a important part of relationships with our children.