Talking through children
One interesting thing I've noticed while hanging around parents and their children (including myself - yes I often hang out with myself and the kiddos) - is that parents often instruct other people what to do using their children. For example:
Parent: Small child, shake hands with uncle!
Uncle immediately sticks out hand even though small child is disinterested and looks away at something else. (Same thing happens with kisses - the Uncle typically reacts many times faster than the child - sometimes we alternate between handshakes, high-fives and kisses to confuse these poor uncles and test their reflexes - it's almost like giving instructions directly to the uncle!)
Some parents also show their displeasure about something but make it seem that the child is the one. For example:
Aunty offers the small child a sweet.
Parent: Small child, you say "no thank you" because you don't like sweets.
Small child: But parent, I want the ...
Parent: No! You don't like sweets. Say "no thank you"
Aunty is feeling very guilty at this point and regrets offering the sweet - she eats it up instead.
It's quite interesting how the interactions form when a parent and a child meet another adult. Sometimes the adult completely ignores the child (child-filter on) and sometimes they talk to the child with the intent of letting the parent listen (the child typically has no clue what this stranger is talking about) with questions like "what is your name?", "how old are you?", "where is your mei mei" and "how much money does your daddy make a month?". When the adult asks a 6-month old child these types of questions - do they really expect an answer?? As the parent, you are supposed to jump in and answer, obviously. Sometimes I let it linger a bit to make things uncomfortable :)
We are all guilty of such things - but it's nothing wrong. It's just little observations that I have ... er .. observed. Most people aren't really very fluent around these little humans (even though they used to be one themselves) ... it's ok - they learn, we learn. Just pay attention to these little behaviours the next time you bring your children out.
Gotta teach Nigel to say "five figures" - but then it won't be true.
Parent: Small child, shake hands with uncle!
Uncle immediately sticks out hand even though small child is disinterested and looks away at something else. (Same thing happens with kisses - the Uncle typically reacts many times faster than the child - sometimes we alternate between handshakes, high-fives and kisses to confuse these poor uncles and test their reflexes - it's almost like giving instructions directly to the uncle!)
Some parents also show their displeasure about something but make it seem that the child is the one. For example:
Aunty offers the small child a sweet.
Parent: Small child, you say "no thank you" because you don't like sweets.
Small child: But parent, I want the ...
Parent: No! You don't like sweets. Say "no thank you"
Aunty is feeling very guilty at this point and regrets offering the sweet - she eats it up instead.
It's quite interesting how the interactions form when a parent and a child meet another adult. Sometimes the adult completely ignores the child (child-filter on) and sometimes they talk to the child with the intent of letting the parent listen (the child typically has no clue what this stranger is talking about) with questions like "what is your name?", "how old are you?", "where is your mei mei" and "how much money does your daddy make a month?". When the adult asks a 6-month old child these types of questions - do they really expect an answer?? As the parent, you are supposed to jump in and answer, obviously. Sometimes I let it linger a bit to make things uncomfortable :)
We are all guilty of such things - but it's nothing wrong. It's just little observations that I have ... er .. observed. Most people aren't really very fluent around these little humans (even though they used to be one themselves) ... it's ok - they learn, we learn. Just pay attention to these little behaviours the next time you bring your children out.
Gotta teach Nigel to say "five figures" - but then it won't be true.